The wedding, on our (my) terms

If it is to be believed that all humans are created equal

Then the wedding should be planned by the participants: both people

I want a wedding in a Tree house, a wedding in a sand castle

A wedding on a butterfly farm with 17 guests to avoid the hassle

I attended a wedding once, it was at City Hall

it was overcrowded like a construction site with not enough portable bathroom stalls

The surrounding neighbors were frustrated - they cried: "Why do you irk us?"

Why would you turn your Holy Matrimony into a great big circus?

I know why, it's because you wanna be seen

Your wedding became your manifestation of your materialistic dream

Your friends and family flipping through your photos in Ovation Magazine

Not I, my ceremony will be on a submarine

That sailed around the world sharing recipes for the Navarin

With everything captured on a little camcorder LCD screen

Picture perfect, my wedding is for my memory

For the MC I'll time travel to the 90s and bring back Bill Bellamy

I'm a health nut, so the wedding menu might be ice tea and celery

All in my mind, this is how I planned it

If I had the oxygen capacity I'd get married on a different planet

Maybe Saturn, because she wanted a big ring

But I'll have 50% of the decision of which extraterrestrial band that sings

The Pastor? I like the French, so he could be Sylvain Wiltord

The ring would be delivered by a 3-legged Alligator in a Bart Simpson mask on a skateboard

Yes it all sounds strange, but this is the path I am treading

Because at the end of the day, it is my wedding